Austin's Blog

We are moving, leaving the only home our son, Gabriel, ever knew. We moved into this house just before he was born, filled with dreams and plans for the life we would share within its walls. Now, as we pack up our lives, I am reminded of his grave up the street—a quiet marker of his brief but precious life. Yet, even as I grieve, I take comfort in this truth that a dear sister whose husband is buried in a state up North shared with me: Gabriel is not there. His body will remain there until the resurrection, but his soul is in the presence of the Lord. “To be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord” (2 Corinthians 5:8).

Death is an enemy, a thief that separates soul from body, a curse brought by the fall (Genesis 3:19, 1 Corinthians 15:26). It is not beautiful or natural; even Jesus grieved deeply when he faced death at Lazarus’s tomb (John 11:33-36). Michael Horton captures this reality, reminding us that while we trust in the hope of resurrection, we are still right to mourn. As the early church mourned the death of Stephen with “great lamentation” (Acts 8:2), we lament for the brokenness death brings. And yet, even in sorrow, there is victory because of what Christ has done.

As Robert Lewis Dabney, who buried three sons, writes, “Ah! When the mighty wings of the angel of death nestle over your heart’s treasures, and his black shadow broods over your home, it shakes the heart with a shuddering terror and a horror of great darkness.” I feel that terror as we prepare to leave, as I stand in the tension between loss and hope. Dabney goes on though, “As I stand by the little grave, and think of the poor ruined clay within, that was a few days ago so beautiful, my heart bleeds. But as I ask, ‘Where is the soul whose beams gave that clay all its beauty and preciousness?’ I triumph!”

We also triumph, knowing that Gabriel’s soul—the essence of who he is—has not been lost. It is safe in the arms of the Savior. Though we leave the home that holds so many memories of him, the promises of God remain our constant. In the resurrection, we will see Gabriel again, fully restored, fully alive. We will leave his body behind in that cold, Louisiana grave, but we are certain this isn’t the end. He isn’t there.